


To You, 7 Years From Now

by TanisVs



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: 104th Training Corps - Freeform, 104th Training Corps Shenanigans, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Canon Compliant, Child Soldiers, Depressed Reiner Braun, Dominant Eren Yeager, Feelings Realization, First Kiss, Horny Teenagers, I wrote this for me but you can read it too if you want, M/M, Magical PathTree Headcanons, My First Work in This Fandom, Non-Graphic Violence, POV Eren Yeager, POV Reiner Braun, Protective Reiner Braun, Reiner Braun Needs a Hug, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Manga Spoilers, Soft Reiner Braun, english is not my first language, no beta we die like everyone in snk, sort of time travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:08:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28989747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TanisVs/pseuds/TanisVs
Summary: Of how Reiner the soldier fell in love with Eren Yeager.Of how Reiner the warrior had to live with it.Or also called "A series of EreRei drabbles that I'm writing for my own amusement and to satiate my cravings for this pair but in chronological order."I don't have a specific schedule planned for posting each drabble, but I want them to be more or less short to explore specific scenes and feelings over the years of the characters' relationship. There won't be particularly explicit scenes, but if you have trouble reading teenage characters experimenting or trying sex, I advise you to not start reading this series, or at least to skip the drabbles where I warn that such scenes are going to happen.Also: SPOILERS.Thank you very much for your reading time, and your dedication. I hope you like it!
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Reiner Braun/Eren Yeager
Comments: 67
Kudos: 421





	1. Chapter 1

Above him was an infinite sky filled with small, twinkling, shining stars. It looked like a wavy sea, peaceful, upon that mantle of infinite sand. There was nothing else. Nothing, except him, and those beautiful trails of lights that ran across the sky and between the stars. Reiner looked around, confused and puzzled. Where was he? It was nothing like the plains of his nightmares, nothing like the camp, nothing like...

“Reiner?”

Reiner gasped and turned around. In front of him, meters, meters away, stood a man. Reiner blinked, suddenly feeling a throbbing in his temples, a faint but strangely shattering pulse. He did not recognize him. He was taller than Reiner by a little and had long, brown, shaggy hair, a several-day beard, and a certain blank but serene expression on his face. Reiner and the man looked at each other in silence for a few seconds, then Reiner glanced around again, waiting perhaps for something to happen.

_ What a strange dream. _

"You think this is a dream." the man said. His empty look seemed to lighten a little and the shadow of a smile curved faintly on his lips. “Yes, of course you do. You are too young."

Reiner felt that throb again, how his hands began to tremble as he felt naked and vulnerable. Breathless. His eyes started to sting, filling with tears without him knowing why. He blinked very fast and sniffed loudly. The man stared at him, again silently, blankly.

"Where am I?" Reiner mumbled. He looked up at the stranger. "Who are you?"

The man raised his chin slightly, and began to walk towards Reiner, slowly and calmly. Reiner had the sudden urge to run, but his knees and hands were shaking, and even if he wanted to, for some reason, his feet stayed stuck in the sand. 

"Who am I..." It was a muffled whisper, a faint spark of sadness. Reiner frowned. The stranger moved closer to him until he was less than three feet away. "And you? Who are you, Reiner?" Reiner took a step back, and almost stumbled. The man followed him. "Are you a soldier... or a warrior?"

Through the locks of hair, the man's eyes glowed with a furious, agonizing green. A glint of electricity crackled in Reiner's mind. Those eyes...

He knew those eyes.

Breath died on his lips, his suddenly dry tongue heaved, and the throb hammered his temples for the third time, terribly, miserably. His eyes filled with tears again. He felt as if he were falling.

He knew those eyes.

Those eyes...

_ Eren. _

Reiner awoke with a gasp. He was on his bunk, face up with his eyes now fixed on the wooden ceiling of the barracks. It was dark, but beside him, he felt the gentle presence of Bertholdt, who was sleeping peacefully in his own bed, curled up like a small pup. Gradually, the natural sounds of a barracks full of sleeping young teenagers surrounded him and Reiner allowed himself to take a deep breath to calm down. His hands were still shaking, gripping the sheets over his torso fiercely. A tear rolled down his temple and wet the pillow before he rolled over, turned his back to Bertolt and closed his eyes tightly.

_ A dream, it had been a dream. _

But he kept shivering weakly, thinking of that strange man, and his angry eyes. Those utterly wild eyes. 

_ Are you a soldier... or a warrior? _

He choked back a sob, not wanting to awake his friend, or draw the attention of those sleeping in the beds below. 

_ I'm a soldier. _

_ I'm a soldier. _

_ I'm a soldier. _

_ I'm a soldier… _

_ Are you sure? _

_ Please, stop. Stop. _

Reiner curled up as much as he could under the sheet and repressed another whimper. He didn't manage to fall asleep again and the next morning he woke up as if nothing had happened. And no one, not even Bertholdt, noticed how much Reiner's hands trembled every time Eren looked at him with those green eyes so full of tenacity, determination…

And rage.


	2. Chapter 2

_Damn it._

_Damn it._

_Damn it._

Reiner frowned with his eyes fixed on his exam. All around him were pencil sounds scratching out answers, grunts, sighs of relief, and even muffled murmurs of someone trying to copy before the teacher could catch them. The blank space under the wording of the question he was trying to answer returned his silence. And a bitter, unpleasant feeling ran down his spine. He closed his eyes. Suddenly he was ten years old again and was writing furiously and desperately on his piece of paper because it was the only thing left to prove that he was a good candidate. 

A good warrior.

A good marleyan.

If he concentrated hard, he could hear Porco's grunts and the constant tap-tap he made with his pencil against the table. Reiner's eyes snapped open and he looked to the side. Connie was there, chewing on his pencil. He seemed to realize that Reiner was staring, looked up and made a grim gesture, tucking his exam under his arm. Reiner looked away with a faint sigh and cast a sly glance at the class. Bertholdt and Annie were further away, concentrating on their respective papers. Further away, Armin was writing at full speed, filling in every millimeter of paper he could. Reiner pressed his lips together, feeling an unpleasant apprehension again.

He turned his attention to his test.

It wasn't difficult, even if you hadn't studied much. It was the first theory exam, after only three months of classes. Three months... It seemed like three years, longer even than the years that had followed the break they had made to the wall. Everything was painfully familiar, and at the same time absurdly odd.

 _It's ironic, isn't it_ , he thought sometimes, when the day was over, everyone would go into their respective bunks and the lights would go out in the barracks. _Who would have told me that I would, at some point, be one of the best candidates for something like this?_

Reiner wasn't able to beat Mikasa in any area, but he was always close on her heels in almost every trial of the training. Annie, of course, and Bertholdt, were the next recruits at the top of the list of favorites to make it into the top 10, even if the unit had just started the formation. 

_Four years ago I would have been the last._

Reiner raised his eyebrows.

_Four years._

_Only four years._

_No._

_Concentrate._

His remaining answer was simple, so he wrote it down quickly and shuffled out of his chair. He wasn't the first to finish and go outside, but...

_I've done enough._

_There's no need to..._

Someone else got up and, at the same time as Reiner, put down his pile of papers together with the question paper on the teacher's desk. Reiner felt his throat closing up.

_Ah._

Eren gave him a sideways glance before looking towards Armin and Mikasa, and heading for the door. Reiner followed, of course. It had been weeks since that dream, that strange dream that he couldn't quite remember, but hadn't completely forgotten either. Details such as the sand texture on his shoes, the brightness of the sky and those light traces that furrowed the stars all over the place. He also remembered the vague feeling of having seen Eren there, but nothing more. When he had told Bertholdt and Annie, Bert was equally confused. And Annie... Annie had looked at him with that stony, cold look of hers and...

_Be careful._

_Careful, careful about what?_ He had asked her, irritated.

Annie had huffed.

_Don't let yourself start liking him._

Liking him.

Because he thought he had dreamt about him.

 _How dangerous_ , he had thought after that, _to be attracted to a devil._

_Right?_

**_Right?_ **

“How was it?” Eren's voice brought him out of his thoughts.

“Uh?”

“The test.”

Reiner blinked and looked at him. Eren was watching him with those bright green eyes that were so passionate and so turbulent about everything. But there was no fierceness or anger in him, just curiosity, excitement and... warmth. A strange, close warmth that tightened the pit of his stomach and throat, made his hands sweat and feel nervous. But in a weird good way. Reiner pretended to be thoughtful with a long, weary sigh.

“Good I guess, it wasn't difficult,” he finally replied.

Eren nodded his head in agreement.

" Yeah, right? Armin was so nervous... He was saying that he was going to fail. Failing, _him_ , with all the study he had done, and everything he knows…” He snorted suddenly. “... and everything I've seen him writing before I left.”

Reiner echoed his little laugh.

“I've seen him, if he doesn't get the highest mark then I don't know what he's writing.”

“Totally!"

Reiner realized that, although he had intended to go ahead for lunch since he had finished his exam and classes already, Eren was accompanying him to the canteen barrack.

“Don't you want to wait for Mikasa and Armin?” Reiner pointed out.

Eren shrugged and his gaze twinkled with amusement.

“Don't you want to wait for Bertholdt?” he counter-attacked.

Reiner blinked again, puzzled, but snorted and noticed himself smiling right away. 

“No,” he replied, softly. “He is almost as dedicated as Armin, it will take him a while to get out.”

“Good,” Eren mumbled.

_Why?_

Reiner swallowed. 

They walked the remaining distance to the canteen barrack in complete silence. Reiner thought it was the first time since they had enlisted that he had been alone with Eren for so long, even if it was just the path connecting the theory classes building to the rest of the barracks. 

_Don't let yourself start liking him._

Reiner gave him a sidelong glance, somewhat intrigued. Liking him... Absurd. Right? 

_How? How I do that?_

At the door of the canteen, Eren took a step forward and opened it. Then he walked back and made way for Reiner.

"After you," he said, playfully.

Reiner snorted again, shaking his head weakly.

Then, as he passed through the doorway and Eren stepped in behind him, his hand brushed Eren's and he felt a sudden spark that devoured him whole. Reiner held his breath, feeling dizzy and tingling all over his body. Reiner stopped in his tracks.

“Hey.” Eren patted his arm, and the feeling became excruciating. It was as if he had been running non-stop all morning. "Shall we sit over there?”

“Yeah, sure” he murmured automatically.

_How?_

_How, Annie?_

_How can I do such thing?_

_I think... I think I can't..._

_I can't._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long! T_T
> 
> Between some things and others, I've had a hard time writing and it's been longer than expected (in fact it's not a drabble anymore, it's a oneshot!). Also... I was adding some ideas for the future drabbles, which came to my mind during my naps, so I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Happy late (for one day) EreRei Valentine's Day <3

The rain was torrential, a whirl of wind, water and thunder, boots sunk in the mud, shaky strides, tired panting and the constant feeling of being...

Reiner stopped mid-run as soon as he reached the top of the hill he and Bertholdt were ascending. All around him was a deep, dark forest that covered the entire mountainside. Only an open road through the trees, winding and tricky, gave them clues to the way back to the base. Reiner sucked a breath, exhausted from running uphill against the rain and with his boots full of water and dirt. Behind him, Bertholdt appeared equally tired and exhausted, his hood down, and absolutely drenched.

"Hey,  _ hey _ ," Reiner said, putting a hand on his arm to keep him from tumbling. "You okay?"

Bertholdt brushed his hair back from his forehead as best he could and sniffed through his nose. He nodded blindly and held on to Reiner as he tried to catch his breath. Neither of them could really open their eyes, due to the curtain of water, so Reiner guided his friend to the trunk of a nearby pine tree and they leaned there, without plopping to the ground. Bertholdt sniffled again and coughed. Reiner closed his eyes and tried to dry his face a little, without any success. Despite the cover of the canopy, the rain was so heavy and dense that it was impossible to really take shelter.

"And we don't even carry a pack," Bertholdt gasped barely above the storm roar. "With all the... times we've... done this... and worse..."

"Yeah..."

Reiner cracked his eyes open. He was so cold, his feet felt so tingly, with his socks all soaked, the leather of his boots wrinkling and cracking... He was also hungry enough to eat Bertholdt's daily ration and his own if necessary. But first they had to finish the trial and reach the base. 

"Do you think... Do you think we're lost?" Bertholdt asked, hesitantly. 

Reiner exhaled a long, shaky sigh. They had no way of knowing how long they had been running in the mountains. There was no sun, no moon or stars. They had been given no watch, not even a compass. They had to find the way, follow it to the end, and reach the finish line. Depending on the order, you earned more or less points. It was the same as always. Only it wasn't the same as always. Even if there was no equipment to carry, even if it was an individual test and one didn't depend on the progress of the rest of the team…

"Probably," Reiner replied, looking up into the distance.

Despite the thick rain and the forest, the core of a valley could be seen, indicating the proximity, perhaps, of a ledge or precipice over which they might fall. The hill they had reached was just another protrusion embedded in the main peak, and its descent was lost among the pine trunks, rocks, fallen trees and thorny bushes. Reiner breathed in again.

_ Six months. Six months and already a third of the promotion has gone. _

He coughed, hoarse and raspy, holding a hand to his mouth. Bertholdt put a hand on his other arm. Reiner muffled his cough as best he could, and Bertholdt,  _ Bertholdt _ , ran his fingers down his arm to take his hand. Reiner glanced at him and saw his worried, trembling look. He gave him a comforting squeeze before letting go.

"Come on," Reiner said looking away. "Let's keep moving."

Bertholdt nodded. 

Then, just as they took two steps towards the path, they heard splashing in the mud further back from where they had come. They both looked and saw two figures appear, one further ahead than the other, running as fast as the terrain would allow. Reiner recognized the first cadet at once, advancing almost in a blind fury against the rain, and felt his stomach shrink, his face heat up and an unusual warmth run down his back. Eren's hood was down too, his hair messy and sodden. He stopped almost dead in his tracks at the sight of Reiner, caught by surprise, and slipped to one knee, his hands in the mud. Reiner didn't even realize he had moved until he was beside him, helping him up. Eren looked up, his breath breaking, shivering with exhaustion and cold, and... smiled at him. Smiled  _ at him _ , really  _ bright _ . Reiner half-opened his lips, suddenly out of breath. 

The second cadet fell in the mud behind them, and Bertholdt had the sense to come to his aid, just as Reiner had done with Eren. Reiner allowed himself a single peek at his friend, who was pulling Armin to his feet without much effort.

"Come on, get up," Reiner muttered then.

"Yeah, thanks," Eren replied, with a weak snort.

Eren held on to his arm, and with a little strength he stood up firmly. The foursome moved away from the slick area and took poor cover under the trees again. Armin had mud on his face, as well as on his uniform and cloak, as did Eren. But they didn't look badly hurt.

"Are you two all right?" Reiner asked, inspecting them.

Now that he noticed, both Eren and Armin had scratches on their faces, maybe the result of having to crawl somewhere, or go through a passage of branches in the forest, or… Armin nodded, trying to wash the mud off his face with the rainwater. 

"Yes, thank you... I thought we were far behind, there was no one around," he replied, and explained right away. "We got lost at the beginning, but then we found that way. It's the right one, if my memory is right,"

_ Ah, yes, Armin must have memorized the map we were shown before the trial started. _

"It has to be, there are no more open paths," Eren grumbled then, rubbing one of his cheek’s scratch. "We know it first hand."

"Then..." Bertholdt ventured. "You haven't seen anyone else?"

Reiner pressed his lips a little. He wasn't exactly worried about Annie. She had gone ahead from the start without waiting for anyone else, just as many other cadets had done. Reiner had decided not to go solo, and not to go too far ahead in case someone else was left behind. Bertholdt had waited for him. It seemed that Eren had done the same for Armin, though he was sure that Armin had not stayed behind because he wanted to wait for someone.

"No," Armin murmured. "I'm sorry,"

Out of the corner of his eye, Reiner saw Eren frown slightly, his eyes fixed on the ground and his arms crossed. He couldn't help but notice the droplets rolling down his temples, and even his neck, how red his nose was, and how much,  _ much _ , his eyes were glossy.

"And Mikasa?" Bertholdt inquired.

Eren flinched. Armin looked away slightly, obviously nervous. For a second, Reiner thought that something must have happened to her to make her not be with them, because there was no way she would leave Eren alone if it wasn't strictly necessary. 

"She wanted to wait for us," Eren began to explain, and Reiner sensed a hint of anger and remorse. "I told her no, that she had to go at her own pace and let me go at mine."

Reiner raised his eyebrows a little and shared a glance with Bertholdt. 

Ah, of course.

"I still don't think you should have done it, not like that," Armin objected. 

Eren growled audibly, and Reiner wondered what kind of bad words Eren had chosen to shoo her away. It would not be the first time this had happened. In other trials, Mikasa had proved capable of staying at the top of the rankings while keeping pace with Eren, and Armin, brilliant in their own fields. Deep down, though, the entire barracks knew that Eren wasn't worried about Mikasa's score, or hurting her results because he was less competent than her. No. It was because Eren wanted, or seemed to want, a space that Mikasa didn't usually give him. Reiner could understand Eren's discomfort. Sometimes Bertholdt, though not to such levels, depended on him a lot. But he accepted it, because it was something he had built for himself. He was the one who had made Bertholdt dependent on his decisions, when...

Reiner gritted his teeth.

If he thought about Marcel, it was Mikasa whom he fully understood.

"Let's go, we are wasting time. And if we come in last we won't get any points," Eren pointed out.

And he started to walk towards the road to go down the ramp. Armin sighed and followed him, pulling his hood over his head and stepping out into the even heavier rain. Reiner clicked his tongue.

The group came down the promontory slowly, careful not to slip. The descent down the hill was abrupt, with steps of rock and mud chewed and carved by the storm. Streams of brown water ran down everywhere, and although on one side there was a wall of dirt, branches, and rocks, on the other the hill stretched straight down against the trunks of the other pine trees, almost vertically.

Reiner wondered if the instructors really wanted to prepare them for combat, or kill them.

The passable road became thinner as they descended, until it was only possible to go one at a time. Eren was determined to lead the way, following Armin's instructions, testing the ground with his feet before telling the rest where it was safest to walk. After some time of stumbling, the storm began to open up and the rain turned into a thin drizzle. Then they came to a new, smaller promontory, where they had to crowd together to avoid falling or being stuck on the edge of the cliff. 

They took the opportunity to take a break.

"We shouldn't be too far from the end of the descent," Armin observed between gasps of breath.

Reiner tried to peek out a little to see the depths, but only managed to glimpse the nothingness between the pine trees growing out of the very wall of the canyon. Bertholdt held his arm as Armin pressed himself against the earthen wall. Eren, holding onto a rock on that wall, leaned out a little too.

"Careful," Reiner warned with a grimace. "Can't see the ground,"

"Yeah," Eren confirmed, standing up straight.

Reiner stepped back from the edge as well, patted Bertholdt on the arm and took a couple of steps forward. Eren turned towards the descent they had to make, while still clinging to the stone and the mud wall. Armin, standing steady, inhaled and exhaled deeply to calm himself.

Then...

Reiner saw it almost in slow motion.

Eren took a step, perhaps too close to the edge, perhaps onto a weaker area of water-worn ground, just dirt and soft mud with no grass to serve as a firm support. The ground collapsed, Eren slid and started to fall into the void. He didn't scream, didn't make a sound of surprise. 

Not even an unfortunate  _ ah _ . 

Reiner rushed forward and grabbed his arm, terror-stricken, as if he had been hit by a fiery, atrocious bolt of lightning. Suddenly it was as if he didn't have enough air in his lungs, as if he wasn't strong or fast enough. As he tried to pull Eren against himself, he also stepped on that unsteady ground and slipped as well.

And they both fell.

He hit his head on something and his vision blurred. Then he heard Armin and Bertholdt voices, crying out their names. But Reiner only had time to think one thing, as he managed to embrace Eren against his body like a ball in mid-air, as he crashed against the trunks, feeling his bones breaking and his muscles tearing apart.

_ Shit. _

* * *

Reiner opened his eyes to that gorgeous, starry sky. There was no rain, no wind, no trees. He made fists in his hands, digging his fingers into the sand. He felt no pain,  _ how strange _ . He tried to move, but except for his fingers and toes, he wasn't able to do anything else. Then he tried to talk, and half-opened his lips, though he only got out a faint gasp. And then again he felt something fall on his chest, something also soft and light. He managed to turn his head.

And he saw a girl. A very young girl.

Reiner's eyes opened wide, fearful.

She seemed… what? eight, nine? He couldn't tell. Blonde, slim and small, as if she was malnourished, dressed in rags.

The little girl paid no attention to him. She patted the ground, picked up some sand, and lay it on his chest with absolute delicacy. Then she amassed that sand where it had fallen, with gentle little hands, until it somehow disappeared inside Reiner's body. Reiner swallowed, feeling that sudden fear, and at the same time a weird calmness. He tried to look around, managing again to glimpse only part of that infinite desert and that sky full of stars and traces of nebulae.

"Where am I?" he asked, in a wisp of a voice, not even able to tremble.

The girl didn't answer, and showed no signs of even noticing his presence or awareness beyond dropping sand on him and then making it into his skin and flesh.

"Calm down,"

A deep, calm voice startled him, and when he looked away from the girl, he saw a man kneeling beside him. A man who wasn't there before.

A man that was familiar...

Reiner blinked and felt another jolt of fear.

He couldn't see his eyes, the man had his hair loose, long, so dark and messy, and was covering a large part of his face. Reiner gulped.  _ It can’t be _ , he thought, suddenly noticing his clothes… very, very similar, if not the same, to Marley's soldier uniforms. He looked frantically for the armband.

There it was, strapped to his left arm, grey and perfect. Grey. It was a common eldian. Not an aspirant to a warrior, not an honorary marleyan.

Reiner breathed in.

The man hummed to calm him and put a hand on his shoulder. His fingers squeezed softly and gently.

"Calm down, Reiner," he petitioned again. "At what point... ?" The man reached up and brushed Reiner's cheek with the backs of his fingers. It was a strangely warm caress, and Reiner felt at once yearning, sadness, and affection. "Oh, right... The cliff."

The strange kid was ignoring this man too, concentrating on whatever she was doing with Reiner and the sand. The man sighed, long, tired, yanked his hand away and rested it on his lap.

"You know what? I almost kissed you that day, when you woke up... I'd been so terrified, and you looked so... dead." His voice held no hint of any emotion other than monotony and resignation. Reiner watched him as he spoke, not quite understanding what he was referring to. "At that time I had no idea how we could have survived such a fall. It was impossible, it had to be a miracle," he paused, with the sound of sand falling on Reiner's skin in the background. "It makes more sense now, of course."

Reiner blinked again, utterly confused. The man had to see his face, because he let out something like a chuckle, a funny snort.

"You were so caring, Reiner, even at your own expense, weren't you? It must have been difficult...” Another pause, and another sigh. "Yes, it's been difficult,"

The girl patted Reiner's chest harder than usual. He let out a gasp and the man looked up slightly.

"You're almost there, it must have only been a few seconds, you managed to harden your back, didn't you? Before you hit the ground." 

Reiner felt another caress, this time on his forehead and hair. A sigh was cut short, his vision blurred and the stars began to fade.

"You saved me that day, not knowing that I would have survived that easily too."

Another strong pat.

Reiner blacked out.

* * *

When he felt conscious, a fine rain was falling again, thunder sounded in the distance and someone was calling him in a hysterical, desperate, trembling voice that Reiner would have recognized anywhere.

"Reiner!  _ Hey _ , Reiner, wake up, dammit, wake up, for fuck's sake!" 

Reiner gasped and opened his eyes. The water made it hard to see clearly, but he could distinguish Eren's blurred form above him. Reiner tried to sit up, and groaned, painfully. 

"Where...?" he mumbled.

He shut up suddenly as he remembered the sand world, the girl, the man, and that they had fallen from a height high enough to have killed themselves, though they were alive and, well, without any apparent wound.

_ Has he seen me? _

_ Has he discovered me? _

_ Have I... healed in front of him? _

He panicked.

_ Shitshitshitshit... _

He sat up abruptly, and almost,  _ almost  _ headbutted Eren in the process. Eren held him, tight, too tight, shaking.

"Shit, Reiner," he hissed, relieved and angry.

And hugged him.

_ Hugged him. _

Reiner sucked in air, suddenly stupidly aware of the heat coursing through his body, of his back unraveling the armored plates he'd formed on a small scale, of Eren sinking his fingers into his wet hair, tugging hard enough to send a shiver of pleasure through him. Reiner blinked

_ I almost kissed you that time _

His mouth went dry.

He raised a hand very slowly and touched Eren's back, covered in mud and pine needles and who knows what else. He squeezed his fingers a little, sensing the tension in the muscles, Eren's own trembling...

"Eren..." he whispered, his tongue feeling heavy, still scared that he'd discovered what it was.  _ Who he was. _ "Eren, I'm fine..."

Eren tightened the embrace and let out a huge, broken gasp. It was almost as if he was about to burst out laughing or crying. Reiner blinked again, his vision blurry not only because of the rain. Warm water rolled down his cheeks, so he closed his eyes and breathed in.

And hugged him back.

* * *

Eren looked at the spot where Reiner had lain seconds before. No trace remained, except for a faint footprint in the sand that soon became just another dune. With a sigh, he slowly stood up and shook off the sand that had gotten on his trousers. He looked around.

Ymir was already gone.

But behind him...

"Eren..." Zeke composed a sorry look on his face.

Eren winced weakly and grunted through his teeth. Obviously, he had seen it all. Without him he couldn't even access that place, or Reiner. Eren didn't look at him, and kept his eyes conveniently fixed on a distant spot, towards where the giant pathway tree was supposed to be, connecting all Eldians to each other, and to him.

"Eren, you have to let him go."

It sounded absurdly coherent and logical. Let him go, it was the right thing to do. But...

" Then..." Eren retorted. "... stop letting me touch your hand."

Zeke frowned and let out a tired sigh.

"You sound so miserable," he said. "You've got him right there in the real world, why look for him in the past?"

Eren flinched and glared at him, but Zeke was undaunted, and gave him a sad, sympathetic, apologetic look in return. Eren knew he felt pity for him, among other many things.

"I want to understand," Eren replied then, that monotony sticking in his throat.

"Understand what?"

A pause of long seconds. Something resembling a soft wind whistled between them and blew up some sand. Eren looked away again, towards the distant path tree. He pressed his lips together, feeling in the pit of his stomach all that unease that had been building up for years after seeing...

He clicked his tongue, and finally answered.

"Everything."


	4. Chapter 4

Reiner felt the knife very light, as if it were made of soft sand instead of wood. He threw it into the air, the knife spun on itself, and Reiner caught it by the handle again. In front of him, Eren snorted.

"Show off," he scoffed.

Reiner snorted as well and curved a slight smirk. He stood in attack position, knife in front of him, his free hand closed into a fist almost against his chest, guarded. 

"I’m not. Get ready," he replied. "Are you sure you don't want to take on someone your own size?"

Eren huffed with a frown, and settled into a defensive role, ready to counter-attack Reiner. That was all the answer Reiner needed to know that Eren didn't  _ obviously _ want to practice those techniques on someone who wasn't better than him. They had already talked about it, speculated about why they needed to learn these things if they were going to fight titans. Reiner himself had discussed it with Bertholdt, in the darkness of the barracks, in unintelligible whispers. What was the need, what was the purpose? Was it all for the first ten who could get into the Military Police? That had to be the reason, because inside Wall Sheena there was no more danger than the people themselves.

Reiner took a deep breath, tightening his grip on the knife, and slid his gaze over Eren's stance. He was firm, standing strong, with his feet firmly planted on the ground, and at the right distance from each other to keep his balance and center of gravity. His fists were perfectly placed to keep his torso protected, as well as his neck and head. He had learned well from Annie that time. Even if the attack were serious, Eren could counter his impetus and strength with ease. Then, without realizing it, he noted how the jacket was straining his arms, and his shoulders, and how the fabric of his trousers was stretched tighter over his thighs. How Eren was breathing through his mouth, his teeth, his lips barely open. In and out, slow, alert. How his eyes were fixed on Reiner, waiting. 

"Hey, are you coming or do I have to do it myself?" Eren shouted, a hint of bravado in his voice.

Reiner swallowed. 

_ Hard _ .

Then he exhaled a huff and pursed his lips, dry, warm.

He charged at Eren.

The assault lasted two seconds. Reiner felt a hand, firm fingers pressing on his arm, then his shoulder. The world whirled, the sunlight blinded him, and he hit his back against the ground. He was lucky to get his chin to his chest in time, before he hurt himself. He closed his eyes for a moment, all the air knocked out of him by the impact. Reiner gasped, and sucked in a breath afterward. When he tried to move, a knee pressed against his chest pinned him to the ground. 

He opened his eyes.

Eren was on top of him, panting too. He had that knee pressed into his torso, the other foot holding Reiner's legs at bay to keep him from moving them. One hand held Reiner's free wrist, above his head. The other held the knife hand to the side. His breathing was heavy, dense, and his eyes flashed with a strange, captivating and alluring fever that made Reiner hold his breath and felt utterly dizzy.

He could almost feel Eren's breath on his face, on his lips.

A warm shiver ran down his spine.

"Eren," Reiner mumbled, and tried to move his hands.

Eren tightened his fingers and pinned him to the ground  _ more _ . It wasn't a hard thrust, but it did make Reiner feel that burning surge all over again. Eren huffed with a satisfied expression.

"This time," he said, in a whisper. Reiner felt his fingertips on his wrist, above the sleeve. It was almost like a gentle caress. He wanted to shake him off, before all the blood rushed to his... "You're not getting away that easy  _ this time _ ,"

Reiner blinked.

"What?" he choked out.

Eren blinked too, abruptly confused.

"What?" he echoed, a weak croak.

They stared at each other in silence for a second. Eren relaxed his grip and Reiner felt much less threatened but equally excited by the fact that he was a stone's throw away from shoving their hips together and being ridden. He swallowed again, and noticed how Eren looked down to see his apple bobbed up and down. Reiner felt the third jolt of warmth rushing down his belly. Eren blinked again, slowly, confused, and stood up a little. He hadn't taken his knee off Reiner's chest, not quite. He wasn’t pushing it hard though, but it was still there, lower and lower, closer and closer…

_ Shit. _

"Eren," Reiner gasped.

"Uh?"

"I still have the knife," Reiner reminded him in a low voice, a husky, harsh,  _ harsh _ , voice.

Eren breathed in, suddenly aware that he might have taken too long to get the knife away from Reiner. Because that was what the practice was all about, disarming the opponent and rendering them useless. Reiner sat up slowly, causing Eren to move away. Not completely, but. He still seemed reluctant to get off Reiner, as if he didn't want to give up his prey. It was... weird, because it wasn't the first time they'd practiced together, though it was one of the first since, well... Since Reiner had started to feel  _ something _ . 

"You failed," Reiner remarked with a sigh. "Let's try again,"

"No,"

Reiner looked up just as Eren shoved him again, not violently, but with enough force to catch him off guard and snatch the knife from his hand. Then, with agility he'd never seen before in him, Eren leaped off his lap, stood up and took a few steps away before assuming an attack pose. Reiner watched him without saying a word, still surprised, and remained half sitting on one leg and about to put one knee on the ground. Eren relaxed his stance and chuckled.

"Come on, Reiner, it wasn’t that impressive, right?" Eren teased.

His smile was so bright that Reiner thought he was running out of air. He sighed, pretending to be resigned, although inside something was madly yelling. He started to get up, but before he did, Eren moved toward him and offered his free hand.

"Hey," he said.

Reiner glanced at him, but didn't even hesitate, and took his hand even though he didn't need his help. He used Eren's little impulse and strength anyway, and dusted off his clothes. What he could. It didn't escape him how Eren kept the knife out of his reach.

He couldn't help but grin.

Suddenly, instructor Shadis's whistle blew announcing the end of practice... followed by the bell calling for lunch. A general roar rose like a cloud of dust, the cheerful and also weary rumbling of all the cadets who had been waiting for the next meal since breakfast. A shriek of joy boomed above the rest of the relief sighs, and a trail of dust made its way across the training ground. Reiner chuckled and shook his head as soon as he saw Connie follow in Sasha's footsteps, shouting that she shouldn't be thinking about eating it all by herself.

_ Again _ .

Eren let out a tired growl, looked down at the knife in his hand and slowly made his way towards the storage barracks.

"Hey, save me a seat, will you?" he said to Reiner, glancing over his shoulder.

"Oh, yeah, sure," Reiner muttered.

He stood there, watching Eren walk away along with the cadets holding the rest of the knives. He could still feel his knee on his chest, pressing, the heat of his skin through his uniform, his furious eyes, searching for  _ something _ . Then someone gave him a small shove. 

"Hey," he protested, frowning.

"Keep your head out the clouds, dumbass," Annie shot back, passing by.

Reiner scowled even more, and suddenly he felt something tightening around his throat, a choking feeling he hadn't tasted in a long time. He swallowed it as best he could, as if it were a rock full of sharp edges, and headed up to the canteen. But the feeling returned shortly, and didn’t leave him until, late at night, he tucked himself up to his chin in his bunk and closed his eyes, falling asleep instantly after, due to exhaustion, and definitely not remembering that soon it would be three years since Bertholdt, Annie and he had broken through the wall and infiltrated among those he had, until then, considered cruel and heartless demons.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: This drabble contains teenagers experiencing their first sexual encounter (a kiss and a bit of grinding, nothing more). 
> 
> If you are uncomfortable with it, I recommend not reading it. If you do so, it is at your own risk.
> 
> Thank you.

If Reiner had a diary to keep track of important things, he would have marked that day without hesitation. What he would have written, that was his doubt.

The warrior would be furious, so he would title it  **The Incident** .

The soldier, on the other hand, would have called it  **One of the Best Days of My Life.**

That day had started like any other. Waking up with the garrison bell thundering. The bustling barracks, buoyed by having made it through a year of training without having to be taken home, useless and worthless. The breakfast. 

Ah, breakfast. 

Maybe that was when it had started.

Reiner recalled that part clearly, as if it had been burned into his skin. A joke, a word said too loudly, a taunt, the temper flaring precisely because of the euphoria of that year accomplished.

That and habit were enough for Eren and Jean to engage in one of their usual arguments. And as always, everyone had sighed in annoyance and ignored them because it was only a matter of time before Instructor Shadis showed up to put them in their place. Reiner never let it get that far, it was his role to intercede, his job, so to say, and he had to set them an example of good behavior. But that morning, unlike every morning before, unlike that whole year, something happened that had never happened before.

When Reiner stepped in to stop them (whose punch and push it was just then, Reiner didn't remember), Jean grunted and backed away, flinching. Until then, Reiner had only seen him try to give Eren another punch, and vice versa, but this time, Eren stood back behind Reiner's arm with a scowl on his face as Jean caught his breath. Reiner looked at them both, thinking it was finally over, as Jean shot a hurt look at Reiner before glaring at Eren furiously.

Then.

The start of the whole mess.

"You're lucky Reiner's playing favorites, Eren,"

The silence that followed that comment was overwhelming, heavy, as if a rock was being dropped on his back. Reiner raised his eyebrows, perplex, because Jean's tone was no longer angry. He recognized a tinge of jealousy that surprised and puzzled him to the point of not knowing what to say.

Nothing but a stupefied:

"What are you talking about?"

Jean looked back at him, huffed, and replied, as arrogant as ever.

"You know perfectly well,"

Then he turned his back on them and, leaving his breakfast, walked out of the barracks. Marco sighed, got up and walked out behind, leaving Reiner as confused as at first. Eren let out a  _ hah _ of his own and returned to his table, sitting down next to Mikasa as if nothing had happened. Shortly after, the general daily chatter filled the room again, but Reiner felt a strange sensation in the pit of his stomach. He sat down at his place, right at the one end next to Bertholdt. He struggled to swallow the next few spoonfuls, fighting the urge to look up from the bowl to peek at Eren, who was only two tables away from him. Bertholdt gave him a slightly concerned glance, but he just sighed and finished his own ration.

They eat in silence.

And when Reiner finally dared to take a look, he met Mikasa's watchful gaze which, even though she didn't seem particularly angry, gave Reiner a terrible goosebump. 

The rest of the day passed normally, as usual. Except for the fact that Reiner couldn't get Jean's words out of his head. Playing favorites. That's what he had said. He thought about it over and over again, which led him to make a lot of mistakes during the training session.

_ It had to be equipment today, right? _

From the start, it had been easy to adapt to the pace of the 104th's training, which was much less harsh than the warrior program. And thanks to Mikasa for being a gifted kid in all physical aspects of training, none of them had to disguise their overqualified abilities too much.

Except for the 3D gear.

That was the only thing where Reiner could make real mistakes and feel absurdly ashamed of himself for being so distracted.

"Reiner, are you okay?" Bertholdt asked after the session was over, as they were removing their equipment for maintenance and convenient storage.

Reiner didn't look at him, concentrating on unbuckling his chest belts. His hands were shaking a little, his body aching from the collisions he had taken against the trees during the raids. All around them, the other cadets were commenting on the training, their most notable maneuvers, joking, laughing, talking about how much they were looking forward to lunch at last. 

Reiner breathed a short sigh.

"Yeah, I guess, not my best day, eh?" he finally mumbled.

Bertholdt nodded, saying something unintelligibly and went on to remove his own belts. Reiner frowned, and pursed his lips, unsure, his fingers slowly sliding one of the straps out of the buckle. He heard the faint clink as if it were a cannon shot.

"It's just that...I don't understand," he said then. Bertholdt looked up, at him, curious. "It's what I've always done, and... Jean seemed so... " Reiner glanced towards the back of the room. Jean was there, helping Marco with his straps, not paying attention to anything else. "... Hurt," Reiner glanced back at Bertholdt then, who was watching him with gentleness and that strange patience he had with him. "Do I really look like I have favoritism? I was just stopping them, as always."

Bertholdt grimaced and shrugged a little.

"Well..." he paused. "You were stopping them, yes, but..."

He fell silent and looked down with a faint murmur.

"But?" Reiner insisted, suddenly feeling again as if he had swallowed a sharp stone.

"You didn't see yourself, Reiner," Bertholdt replied, bending down to undo the straps on his legs. "It looked more like you were protecting Eren from Jean..."

"What?" Reiner sounded utterly baffled.

Bertholdt's expression told him everything. Reiner blinked, trying to make himself remember. He recalled giving them a reproachful look, extended an arm, and then... The memory hit him like a bolt. Reiner raised his eyebrows. 

_ I turned my back on Eren and faced Jean. _

_ And everyone had seen me. _

He exhaled a long, resigned sigh.

_ Shit. _

His head was in the clouds for the rest of the day.

In the afternoon, when the last exercise was finally over, Instructor Shadis assigned a few cadets to move some of the new shipment of supplies to the warehouses, Reiner among them. Carrying boxes from the carts to the barracks was a simple, mechanical task that helped him forget a little about what a disaster the day had been. Though not the fact that he had only met Eren a couple of times, and both of them the boy had said nothing to him but a few banal comments before launching into flight with the 3D gear, searching for targets. 

Apart from that, Reiner had felt... ignored.

Thinking about it, as he set one of the crates down on the pile he was organized in the appropriate storage section, made him feel a little miserable. Reiner stood still, his hands resting on the newly placed box and his eyes fixed on the wooden lid. He closed them. It was so frustrating... What was he doing, at what point had he gone so far out of his mind that he needed Eren to look at him for more than two seconds non-stop, or talk to him, or at least smile at him? 

_ Shit. _

A thump and the sound of some kind of avalanche of boxes made Reiner open his eyes in sudden surprise. A voice yelped and let out a harsh groan. Reiner didn't think twice and rushed to the back of the warehouse, where someone was still struggling to keep a tower of crates from falling on top of him. Reiner stepped into the aisle of more boxes and held the one that was slipping on the struggling cadet, who in turn was supporting another box above himself.

Reiner managed to keep the cargo balanced without it collapsing on either of them.

" _ Phew _ , thank you," 

_ Shit. _

Eren looked up and gifted him a relieved smile, even though his arms were shaking from the effort. Reiner gulped, realizing that he was cornering him against a wall of containers, almost chest to chest.

"Ah, no problem," he replied, hoarse, suddenly feeling a wave of fire licking up and down his back, his knees weak and his throat dry. His heart kicked hard in his chest, the adrenaline making his blood run hot. It was like being on alert for danger, lying in wait, waiting for a titan to devour you. But he liked it. Shit, he  _ liked  _ it. "Wait, just let me..."

He managed to get his box up to the top without much trouble. He then grabbed Eren's and maneuvered it right next to the one he had just placed. Eren let out a sigh of relief and leaned slightly against the stack of boxes.

"Thank you," he said again with a chuckle.

Reiner held his breath, because Eren was looking at him with that intensity with which he always watched him. He realized that he hadn't stepped away from him, but even if he wanted to, he couldn't because he had another stack of boxes behind him.

"You're welcome," he murmured almost without knowing it, like an idiot.

He went silent,  _ they went silent _ , looking at each other, with the buzz from outside, of other cadets going back and forth, in the background. Reiner noted the abrupt tension, getting harder and stronger, rougher and raspier, like a wire that was about to come loose, to burst and hit him in the face. He felt that anxiety in his chest too, in his gut, his breath growing heavier and slower, as if he feared Eren would notice something and run away, and never speak to him again.

But then he understood that Eren was not the one who would run, no way. Eren stood upright and barely separated from the crates, and Reiner was tempted to move away. He didn't, feeling his feet glued to the floor, and unable to do more than twitch his fingers, hesitant.

"Reiner," Eren whispered suddenly, nearly catching him by surprise, his name as a secret between them, like a question he couldn’t form. 

A question Reiner didn’t know if he was ready to answer but that he wanted to respond with all his might. He pursed his lips, swallowed, and...

Eren stood on tiptoe, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, and kissed him. 

And the fire spread everywhere and devoured his skin, his muscles, and made his blood burst with a rush so intense that he thought he would fall to his knees. It was only a peck, but Reiner pinned Eren against the crates, softly, grabbing his hips, and kissed him back.

Eren let out a weak whine, a plea for more.

Reiner obeyed.

He slid his hands up, thumbs feeling every muscle tense, his burning skin under the clothes. He heard the hitch in Eren’s breath as he brushed his back. He stopped there, pressing himself more against Eren. Then, though he didn't quite know which one of them did it first, parted his lips and… The kiss became sloppy, rough, with too many teeth clashing, too much lip biting, too much tongue. But it was electric, explosive, as when he summoned his titan power and his whole body was heat, rage and an unnatural passion. Eren circled Reiner’s neck with his arms, running his fingers through his hair, tugging desperately hard. It made Reiner feel all the blood, all the fire, drain from his chest and back to his belly, making him hard almost instantly. Reiner moaned on Eren’s lips, so soft and warm, and leaned closer, moving against him, feeling Eren’s breath tickling on his cheek.

All he was hearing was them. All he was feeling was Eren’s tongue, Eren’s hands.

Eren.

_ Eren... _

Eren thrust against Reiner, clumsily, sliding one hand from his nape to his chest. Reiner felt that Eren was as hard as him. A moan hummed. Reiner bit Eren’s lips and kissed his chin, then came down and started to kiss his neck. It was salty, hot. Reiner didn’t mind.

" _ Reiner _ ," Eren groaned, throwing his head back in delight, his voice broken and husky.

Then, just then, Eren squeezed his pec, hungrily, as if he'd wanted to do it for a long time. Thus... he curved his thumb and rubbed his nipple, squeezing it too.  _ Hard _ . And Reiner whited out, with a faint gasp, a shock of pleasure wet and hot all over. 

It was only a second, but a long,  _ delicious  _ second.

He froze suddenly, flustered, his forehead almost on Eren's shoulder, his hands on his waist.

He heard his own breath coming in ragged, raspy gasps.

_ Shit. _

_ Oh, shit. _

"Reiner?" Eren caressed his chest, slowly, maybe unsure of what had just happened. Reiner didn't dare to raise his head, but he felt the gentle brushes in his hair as well. "Are you okay?"

Eren's voice was still breathy. 

_ Fuck _ .

"Yes..." Reiner replied in a whisper, a muffled voice, so tiny, that he didn't know if Eren had heard him. He gulped. "Sorry, I… " 

He couldn’t say it.

"Hey, don't be sorry," Reiner felt Eren's warm breath on his ear, a brush of his cheek, fingers on his shoulder. "It’s okay… "

It was a tender, caring touch, nothing like the awkward attempts to rub against each other from moments before. Reiner closed his eyes for a second and inhaled deeply. Eren smelled of sweat, gas, oil, metal… Somehow it was an extremely and nice scent.

"Did it feel good?" Eren asked then, in the same tone of voice.

Reiner tightened his lips, wishing to kiss his neck again. He was so tempted… Now he was much calmer, he thought about kissing it slowly, nipping it, and wondered how it would be sliding the tip of his tongue from down to up, all the way to the earlobe. 

How it would be licking the lobe, how it would be sucking it.

And if Eren would tremble and moan again.

If he would moan his name with that tiny thread of broken voice.

He felt a shiver.

"Yes," he replied, a mumble in fact.

"Did you... liked it?"

This pause made Reiner crack a smile, and finally decide to stop hiding. He stood up and looked at Eren, at his bright precious green eyes, and noticed how flushed were his cheeks, how cute, how pretty he was after a kiss.

"Yes… " He whispered, sliding his hands up Eren’s sides.

Eren trembled and took a deep breath. He seemed relieved, relaxed, as if until that moment he had been afraid that Reiner would get angry, or say that what they had just done had been wrong, or a mistake. He wet his lips, glancing down. So did Reiner.

Eren was still hard.

"Hey, just let me... Let me do something," Reiner murmured, running a hand down to touch Eren's firm belly. He brushed a finger over the dimple of his navel. Eren swallowed.

"Wait," he said, almost forcefully.

Reiner moved his hands away. Eren didn’t look at him, his eyes fixed on some infinite point between them. He was shaking a little.

"Sorry," Reiner mumbled, feeling somewhat remorseful.

"No, no, don't be," Eren coughed, raising a hand to his mouth, covering it. "It's just,  _ uh _ , I was thinking..."

He went silent. Reiner waited. Then a thought crossed his mind... that maybe Eren had just realized that the kiss, all the grinding, was something they shouldn't have done. Or that he regretted it. And Reiner felt a wave of terrible nervousness.

Because he wanted it.

He wanted to do it again.

_ And so, so bad... _

He realized he was holding his breath, waiting for Eren to say something. So he puffed out a sigh, almost muffled, shaky sigh. Eren clicked his tongue and tugged his clothes back on, slowly.

"Uh," he grumbled and glanced up, shy. His cheeks were still rosy, his lips a little puffy. Reiner held back the urge to kiss him again. Eren looked towards the end of the aisle. "Well... Before we get caught, we could...  _ Hm _ , we could wait for the off-hour." Again he didn't look back at Reiner, coyly, his face flushed red. "If you want to..."

Reiner raised his eyebrows, surprised. 

"Uh, eh..." he babbled.

Suddenly a door slammed, and Instructor Shadis voice rumbled through the entire warehouse.

"Braun, what the hell are you doing?! The cargo isn't going to place itself, move your ass!"

"Shit," Reiner hissed, pushing Eren towards the back of the space they were in, hiding him behind himself in case Shadis happened to peek out. "Yes, sir! Sorry, sir!"

Eren clung to his arm, trembling. They heard Shadis' rant about how little discipline the cadets seemed to have even after a year of training. Then his footsteps walking away. Reiner glanced at Eren and gave a resigned grunt. Then he cupped his face, without thinking, and kissed him. A chaste, tiny kiss, as a sort of farewell until later. Eren sighed, weakly.

Dreamy.

_ Shit. _

"Meet me after dinner, uh, hm, I don't know, here. Okay?" Reiner whispered, pulling away from him and stepping out into the central hallway.

He didn't wait for Eren's answer.

With every step he took, he made a longer, faster stride, nervous and anxious about something he couldn't put a name to. His hands were shaking, his back tingling, and he still felt that fire in his face, his lips. 

Everywhere.

He had...

Oh,  _ fuck _ , they had…

_ Annie is going to kill me. _

Reiner swallowed.

_ Only if she finds out _ , said a voice in his head, which sounded suspiciously like his own in a selfish way. Reiner took a deep breath, hoping it wouldn't show that he had just cum in his pants. He walked as if nothing was wrong to the supply cart, and picked up another box, wondering if Eren had slipped out as well and gone back to work. He had no idea. For him, it would be noticeable that, well…

_ Don't think about it. _

_ Don't think about his hands on your hair. _

_ Or on your chest. _

_ Please, don't do it now. _

No one paid him any attention.

Reiner continued with his task.

And he started to wait.


End file.
